Newbie Mama

Newbie Mama – Why Don’t People Tell You These Things?!

Octomom: Wasn’t 6 enough?? February 13, 2009

Filed under: Baby,Controversy,Motherhood,Parenting — bboston88 @ 1:57 am

Listen everyone, I’ve been MIA for over a year since I returned to work (that’s the way that goes) but Ocotmom and her octuplets has me riled. Clearly, I believe this woman has a mental illness. I truly believe the doctor who implanted her the second time around since have his license revoked. She has no means of support, will max out her health insurance and thinks God will take care of it all. Guess what, he won’t! The attorney in me is more than a little disgusted by the fact she collected over 165K in disability payments while saying she could not work. Raising (6 at the time) with 2 having special needs??? That’s harder than any “paying” job out there.

Newbie Mama signing off.

Advertisements
 

I Saw Your Nanny… October 24, 2007

Filed under: Motherhood,Parenting — bboston88 @ 5:50 pm

This site (I Saw Your Nanny) has been around for a while, NYC in the beginning, but now it seems to be expanding to other cities. People anonymously post incidents of nanny neglect and even pictures of the neglect in action. It’s pretty horrifiying on many levels. The “Big Brother” aspect is a little disturbing but not nearly as much as some of the behavior.  I’m not sure if it’s through this site or not but there is a program where you can buy a stroller tag and put it on the stroller (like a license plate) so any reporting can correctly identify your negligent nanny. I think that’s a little extreme. You’re already putting the nanny on the defensive from the get-go.

 I’ve been thinking of nannies because I am (hopefully) returning to work next week. We will be trying 2 days a week of daycare and 2 days with a nanny at home. We are very lucky to know this nanny and have worked with her a long time. I have total confidence in her. But for those who don’t……And sometimes people post “good nanny” sightings!!

 

Maddie McCann–Missing or Murdered? September 10, 2007

Filed under: Motherhood,Parenting — bboston88 @ 8:12 pm

family.jpgindex_03.jpgI, as most people, was horrified when I first read about Madeleine McCann’s disappearance while vacationing in Portugal. Certainly her parents would not have chosen to leave her and her siblings sleeping while dining if they had to do it all over again. But how many times are we all tempted to do such a thing? We were vacationing in the same building as friends, with a video monitor. I was very tempted to tuck her in and share a glass of wine with my friends. Thankfully because of Maddie I did not. In reality, she likely would have been just fine. But what if there had been a fire? Or worse?

Now comes word that perhaps an arrest of Maddie’s parents is imminent. The Portugese police believe that her mother accidentally killed her by an overdose of a sedative. A sedative may make sense if she was trying to get her child to sleep and she is a doctor with access. However, the alleged blood evidence sounds shaky and one must wonder why, if the parents were responsible for something sinister, they would stay in the country and drum up so much media investigation into the matter. It does not make sense.

I hope that she is still alive and found and hope the parents are not responsible for anything regarding her disappearance. I do not believe they are. I believe they are absolutely tortured right now and suffering more because of the bungling Portugese police. I hope I’m right.

Telegraph Article on McCann’s Return from Portugal

Find Madeleine

 

Parenting Dictated August 20, 2007

Filed under: Mom,Motherhood,Parenting — bboston88 @ 2:04 am

fingerpoint-sm.jpgWhile at the aforementioned birthday shindig, I was speaking to another mother of a child the same age as Grace. She said she was dreading the 12 month appointment because “I know the dr. will say he should be on one nap by now and he’s still on two and I don’t know what to do” etc. etc. I felt so bad for her and I realized, we’ve all been there. The guilt and feelings of failure about what you SHOULD be doing and how you SHOULD be parenting and if your child isn’t feeding himself while signing his requests to you while at the same time expressing interest in toilet training than you’re just a loser mom who is raising an idiot.

That’s how it feels sometimes when you read too many books, you have too many people giving you (usually unsolicited) advice, and you put too much pressure on yourself to be the perfect parent. I’ve realized I’m not the perfect parent. If Grace makes it through the day unscathed I consider it a victory. She’s a year old now and still taking two naps, won’t take a sippy cup and still uses her pacifier. So I’m pretty much a loser mom by most books accounts. That’s why I don’t read them anymore unless there’s a specific topic I’m looking for answers to. Even then, I try to keep it brief.

When I am looking for “real world” info, I check out Ask Moxie, a great blog for real-life parenting. If you’re hyper-scheduled and anal retentive, this won’t be for you. Moxie goes with the flow. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a huge fan of schedules (lest you think I’m a fly by the seat of your pants kind of mom) and Grace is on a tight one. Except when she isn’t….Like now when she’s teething. Screw the schedule, she needs cuddles. The schedule can wait.

 

Is Vacationing With a Toddler an Oxymoron? August 14, 2007

Filed under: Motherhood,Parenting — bboston88 @ 3:50 pm

pack_and_play270x202.jpgWe decided that it would be a fun idea to take Grace on a little trip to the beach. We rented a condo and packed up the pack in play, brought her favorite items and were off. But things didn’t exactly go as planned…Our superstar sleeper absolutely refused to sleep at night. The daytime naps were fine but nighttime…no way. Nothing would soothe her, not even being in our room. She couldn’t sleep with us because she’s too much of a squirmer and ended up trying to climb up the headboard. Eventually we took turns staying with her in the main room and sleeping on the couch. We even kept the TV on. She still woke up every few hours. It was painful. Almost like when she was a newborn. We cut the trip short for our sanity and last night (her first night home) she slept like a rock. And she’s still sleeping with no signs of stopping. I’m not sure if it was the perfect storm of teething, unfamiliar surroundings, her age (12 months), or what. Lessons learned: get a bigger place with no common walls. She knew we couldn’t let her cry because of the poor neighbors and I swear she played on that. Other than that, I’m not really sure what could have been done better. Any ideas???

 

Study Says Moms Too Quick to Reach for the Bottle *Offers No Suggestions For Working Moms August 8, 2007

Filed under: Baby,Infant,Motherhood,Nursing — bboston88 @ 1:52 pm

images1.jpgFound this article on Yahoo about how moms are “too quick” to reach for the bottle and then end up stopping breastfeeding sooner than they “should.” It notes that women should “ideally” breastfeed for six months or more.

Great idea but let’s talk reality. We have no mandatory maternity leave (paid) in this country. Thus, many women have to return to work (wow, what a concept!). I was planning on returning to my work after 3 months. This was unpaid leave by my employer but I would have been able to collect disability in California for about half my salary during that time period. If you live in another state or can’t get buy on half of your salary, I guess you get to go back earlier. I planned on breastfeeding too. Luckily I had my own office and could shut the door and pump away. However, I really could not work during this time or carry on phone conversations so this would be a significant chunk of time out of my day. I worked as an attorney with billable hours required and every minute counted, literally. So if I tood 30 minutes per day to pump, I’d basically be at the office another 45 minutes later in the day. That would put me at 6:30 for leaving. We had moved out of the city so I’d be home at around 7:15. My daughter goes to bed at 7pm so I guess I would just see her on the weekends 🙂 We ended up moving and I was able to stay home with Grace for the first year so this turned out not to be an issue for me. But it is for many, many women.

My friend worked in a cubicle and had to pump in the computer server room. Many pump in bathroom stalls with no electrical outlets. Gee, I wonder why they eventually give into the bottle. Let’s face it, its not easy on the mamas. Let’s focus on mandating breaks and facilities on the employers and a little less guilt on the mothers please.

AP article regarding bottlefeeding